Finding Resources For Your Journey

Staying plugged in keeps me growing.  My journey has been seeking and being.  For me this means I go into different modes.  I want to describe two of the modes I operate on.  There are more but let's keep it simple.  :) 

Seeking for me happens when I become restless, irritable, and discontent.  This is when I get into solution mode.  For me solution mode always comes to Step work with the main focus being on my conscious contact with my HP.  I will pick my sponsors brain, hit the book store for inspirational books and read read read.  Sometimes it is more about the sitting and being quiet.  I will light candles and just work on being still so I can be inspired by my God/HP/the universe.  In any case I go into seeking mode because  "God could and would if He were sought."   So I seek.

My next mode is being.  Just being in life.  Experiencing each moment.  Living through the ins and outs of each day.  Some days bumpier than others.  The seeking I do allows me to live.  To participate.  Not perfectly.  Not like saint like.  It allows me to have the strength, energy, freedom, to soberly live.

If your seeking ways to improve your conscious contact with God, start talking to others in your support network.  Hit the bookstore.  Hit your knees.  Go to your church, a yoga center, nature reserve, retreat house, etc.  Whatever you need to do to connect with your understanding of God.

Because HE CAN AND WILL IF YOU SEEK.

Namaste,
Gwen R~
If you would like to contribute a post on Step 11 please contact Gwen R.

Meditation for 12 Step - Cleaning the House

So during my yoga teacher training we had to write meditations for the beginning of our classes.  It was suggested since I will be teaching the Yoga of Recovery to write a recovery based meditation.  I have to say I really enjoy this process.  What is most fun is hearing what people visualized when doing the meditation. 

So I won't write word for word what I did.  But I will give you something to visualize when meditating. 



Picture a set of 12 steps.  What do they look like?  Are they outside?  inside?  wood?  stone?  carpeted?  Get a good visual of your steps.

Notice there are obstacles on your steps.  As you slowly walk up your stairs clean up your stairs so you can walk through.

Once on your twelfth step look back down and notice this path you have made.  Notice how it feels.  Will you have to unload and go back down to clean up more? 

That is a shortened version and a general idea of the visual.  I was more specific and had people stop at specific Steps and related specific obstacles to pick up (character defects, etc.)

So what did people see? 

Types of steps - clouds, wood on a beach, wide with a red carpet, marble etc.
Obstacles - toys, dirty socks, assorted clutter etc.
Looking back down - still much to clean up but a path was made

Using these visuals can help in many ways.  It can help give us the confidence to work the Steps and clean up our stairs.  It lets us know it is a process.  We may not get our stairs fully clean the first time around but a path is made and that is but a beginning.  It is now easier to go back down the stairs and clean more, clearing our path a little more each time.  We can connect with our feelings in this process.  Although many don't like the feelings it may bring up which can help us dig even deeper. 

So WHY would we do any exercise like this?  Ultimately to let in the sunlight of the spirit.  To get closer to God, your Higher Power, deepen your spiritual connection.  It does not matter how you word it, clean house so there is nothing between you and spirit.  Then we can give back to others.  Our cups are full and we have something to give.  To keep our cups full so we are not drained "We sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God as we understood Him, praying only for knowledge of His will for us and the power to carry it out."

Yours in service,
Gwen R~

An IOCC Reader Shares His Experience Strength and Hope on Step 11

I would love to have a conversation with God, to sit close and hear
actual words being spoken by my Higher Power, especially as S/He
clearly explains the perfect direction for my life. If that’s not
possible, could I have a fresh email from my Higher Power sitting in
my inbox each morning? Isn’t that what step 11 is all about, finding
the knowledge of God’s will for us?

I had heard of a Step Eleven meeting at a nearby town. Twenty minutes
of mediation and 40 minutes of sharing was the weekly agenda. I went
with expectations for I was struggling with depression and fear. I was
tired of coping and had a deep hope that someone or some God could
alleviate my pain. I wanted a deeper connection with God, often
frustrated that I could go through the day without a thought of God. I
had attempted mediation in the past, trying to still my mind, to quiet
the endless stream of thoughts that poured down those well worn
groves. Those attempts always ended in frustration, the noise of my
thoughts getting louder as I attempted to hush them. Thoughts that
made breathe difficult. I could never repeat my experiences in group
meditation where I had long moments of peacefulness. But on my own?
Nada. The shitty committee moves in and throws a party.

So I found that meeting, sat in the circle among welcoming faces, and
enjoyed the next twenty minutes of quiet. Listening to the swish of
breathe, small sounds of people adjusting their positions, my breathe
becoming one with theirs. It was peaceful, serene, and I was not
alone. Then the sharing started and I listened as others shared of
their frustrations and successes with meditation. When I shared, it was
of my desire for a deep connection with my Higher Power, for direction
in my life. I must have alarmed the next speaker, for he softly warned
me that, perhaps, my expectations were too high. I reacted in old
ways, feeling scolded and unloved. The color of the meeting changed,
became cold and unwelcoming. Old fears welled up, precipitating into
anger. I sat quietly, waited for the meeting was over so I could put
my coffee cup away in token service, then exiting with tears revealing
my frustrations and self-pity.

I walked a long time till I found a spot to sit and ponder; trying to
understand what was the purpose of mediation. I tried to look at my
part but couldn’t, still resentful of others. I found the Grapevine
booklet “The Best of Bill” in my pocket and opened it up to the essay
on Love. I read:

“Suddenly I realized what the matter was. My basic flaw had always
been dependence - almost absolute dependence - on people or
circumstance to supply me with prestige, security, and the like.
Failing to get these things according to my perfectionist dreams and
specifications, I had fought for them. And when defeat came, so did my
depression.”

Then I could see my part. I wanted that damn magic wand again, my
Higher Power’s wand that would make my problems go away, that would
arrange my life in perfect order. Hmmmm, perhaps sloth comes to mind,
laziness, not wanting to do the work, an easy out. Reminds me of
drinking.

I understand there will not be a conversation with my Higher Power to
map out my life or even just today. My journey will be like that of
others, the path to be discovered as I travel through the day, while
being unable to avoid the painful episodes that life’s circumstances
bring. And what is God’s will for me? Just to be helpful to the person
in front of me, not expecting or demanding anything in return. To
trust.

Submitted by an IOCC reader...

As We Understand Him

The question of how to approach the man we hated will arise. It may be he has done us more harm than we have done him and, though we may have acquired a better attitude toward him, we are still not too keen about admitting our faults. Nevertheless, with a person we dislike, we take the bit in our teeth. It is harder to go to an enemy than to a friend, but we find it much more beneficial to us. We go to him in a helpful and forgiving spirit, confessing our former ill feeling and expressing our regret.
Alcoholics Anonymous pg 77

“But to you who are willing to listen, I say, love your enemies! Do good to those who hate you. Bless those who curse you. Pray for those who hurt you. If someone slaps you on one cheek, offer the other cheek also. If someone demands your coat, offer your shirt also. Give to anyone who asks; and when things are taken away from you, don’t try to get them back. Do to others as you would like them to do to you. “If you love only those who love you, why should you get credit for that? Even sinners love those who love them! And if you do good only to those who do good to you, why should you get credit? Even sinners do that much! And if you lend money only to those who can repay you, why should you get credit? Even sinners will lend to other sinners for a full return. “Love your enemies! Do good to them. Lend to them without expecting to be repaid. Then your reward from heaven will be very great, and you will truly be acting as children of the Most High, for he is kind to those who are unthankful and wicked.
Luke 27-36 NLT

Father God, I thank you for your mercy and forgiveness. I pray Father that I may forgive others as you have forgiven me. Help me to be kind and compassionate toward those that have not been kind towards me. Help me to walk in love and not become offended. Help me to do good to others and bless them and not expect anything in return. I pray Father that I would act and be more like you today.
In Jesus Name, Amen.

by Cheryl O.
http://www.cherylsbookmarks.com/Asweunderstandhim.htm

What I Learned From Jody K.

Read the posts of Jody K.

In Jody's post Following the Signs I keyed in on two paragraphs. The first was (5th paragraph) when Jody wrote of he simple morning prayer "God, guide my thoughts and actions. Please make me useful today." Next I zoomed in on (11th paragraph)"though I've come to the conclusion that if I listen and follow signs, I'll fall in step with God's will for me. And I'll be given the power to carry that out - in time, resources, inspiration, or whatever I might need." I identified with these actions actions. Though I may use different words I too ask God in the morning to be of service to others. Without a doubt I believe God gives me the power to carry that out. No matter how much I may drag my feet I am given what I need to be of service to others.

When reading Meditation on Being I had a LOT of nodding going on. Oh yes indeed! I loved hearing about "wordless prayer" and "Aligning myself is Harmony." How I related to all of her words describing this and had never put it to words. I especially related to how her concept of a Higher Power shifts. My concept of a Higher Power is first the God of I grew up learning about. All of the other spiritual and religious concepts I have learned since becoming sober help me understand my Higher Power on a deeper level. I learn from so many sources, so like Jody my concept of my Higher Power shifts.

How do I make use of what Jody has to offer? For me reading the words that describe what I frequently do helps me to be mindful of the action. So now when I am doing "wordless prayer" I can be mindful of it. I can practice being in the moment when taking the time to "breathe for a while." I can also make use of what Jody wrote about being given the power to carry out God's will for me. I can always always use reaffirming, after all I am only human. ;)

Thanks Jody K. for all you have offered us!

January 13, 2008
Carol Ann Preston

Inspiration: motivation, incentive, enlightenment, illumination, brainstorm, vision, etc.

Practicing the discipline of prayer and meditation for over 26 years I have been willing to learn and grow as Ilearn to listen and recognize inspiration and to follow God’s Spirit as the source to inspire my daily life. Today I rely on Spirit’s inspiration and more readily recognize the difference between ego inspired thoughts and those that are in harmony with the Spirit of Christ and these have a foundation of love, joy, perseverance and discipline. I have found one consistent theme and that is Love.

Some examples where I have experienced inspiration have often been the simplest ones that I hear at the beginning of the day, when I am uncertain what I am to do that day, ‘get up and do the next right thing.’ Sometimes I am inspired to clean house, other times I am inspired to write, make phone calls, write letters, or take a walk. These are the simple and what seems to be ordinary inspirations of my daily life, although in the beginning there was no such thing as ordinary inspiration, as my spirit was starved for inspired thoughts, something that was not focused on me. It has been through many spiritual awakenings, practicing disciplined prayer and meditation in my life that ushers into my mind inspired thoughts at various times of the day. Beginning with a committed, disciplined relationship with Christ, I also committed to follow His lead, as I am directed, on a ‘need to know basis.’ In doing so, inspired thoughts and opportunities of service have increased as I also continue to practice examination of conscious and watch for 'ego' that would deceive me.

Sometimes I wake up at 3:00AM and I am inspired to get up and pray for others. Sometimes I am inspired during my time of prayer who to pray for, but many times I pray for people in general, and I pray for about an hour and then go back to bed. In the early years of listening to inspiration, I was also growing in my trust in God’s Spirit to guide me throughout the day and I began to experience seemingly simple guidance as I practiced the discipline of ‘listening.’ I learned that discipline and trust is a key component in my being inspired. I had become willing to follow as He led, on a need to know basis. And this simple attitude works well in my harmonious relationship with God. Knowing He his part is to lead and mine is to follow.

One early afternoon I was on my way home from work, having worked late the night before I was afforded the privilege to go home early and I looked forward to taking a much needed nap before my children came home from school. A block before our home, the thought came to my mind to drive to my daughter’s school and pick her up. I argued back and forth in my head as I considered my desire to take a quick nap and I did not want to go anywhere else. But, this inspiration did not stop; over and over in my head was the same instruction, "Go to your daughters school." After relenting, sensing this instruction was an opportunity of trusting discipline, I followed and made a left turn at the stoplight and drove straight to her school.

I parked along the driveway, where there were plenty of other parents in their cars waiting for their children. This was Jr. High and since I saw plenty of students lingering out front I assumed the school bell had already dismissed students for the day. With parents sitting in their car I noticed there was no school faculty out front with the students. I thought this was odd and then saw a large gathering of students off to the front side of the school building. Recalling Jr. High myself, I sensed this meant trouble. I got out of my car and walked into a circle of students and heard, "Mom" loud and clear and noticed my daughter was one of those on the outside of the circle with the other kids. There were two pre-teen young girls in the middle of this circle who were about to start fighting. I mean physically fighting, with a large gathering of other students surrounding and encouraging them. I noticed that one of my daughter’s best friends was in the middle of this soon to be fight. "Where were all the teachers?" I thought to myself. I yelled out my daughter’s and her girlfriend’s name and with authority told them both to follow me and get in my car, ‘NOW!’ With no argument, the girls quickly followed me and jumped into the backseat of my car, with no word spoken by anyone until we had pulled away from the school. "What was going on?" I asked. I was told that my daughter’s friend was about to fight another, much stronger and bigger girl from school as she had made this girl mad and had known she would be hurt in a fight, and so on. She was greatly relieved to having had an option out of the fight. I thought silently to my self, "God knew there would be no faculty out front when this fight would have occurred, and someone called out to Him for help, and I was able to ‘hear’ an opportunity to be His instrument of service."

The girls wanted to know why I was there, since it was not customary for me to pick my children up from school. I told them about the inspired thought that came to my thoughts and told them that their guardian angels were looking out for them that day and to thank God for His ever-presence, and reminded them that all areas of our lives matter to God. Arriving home, I allowed myself a time of peace and quiet prayer and meditation, never forgetting this example to follow persistent inspiration, even when I do not know the why of it all.

The last example I would like to share, is when my young cousin died. One early morning, during my prayer and meditation time, I sensed that I needed to drive the following day and visit my aunt and uncle. I told my husband, noticed that I had no previous commitments, and packed for the following days 4 hour drive. I went about my day as normal, and went to bed with plans to spend one to two days with my relatives.

The following morning, after I had begun my day, I received a phone call early from my mother. She told me that my cousin had drowned the day before, as he worked on a barge in the Gulf of Mexico and it had taken on water, and my cousin did not survive. She told me that it would be at least a day before she could put her affairs in order to make the drive to her brother’s home, and asked me if I could drive to stay with them until she could get there.

I told her that I was already packed, and about the inspired thoughts to go and visit my aunt and uncle the day before. When she called, I was already dressed and packed, ready to go, ready to be of service to my aunt and uncle who had just been notified that their only son had drowned. Leaving grieving parents, a sister, a young widow and 3 young children to pray for and minister too.

As I drove the next few hours, I talked to God the entire way, with a grateful heart that I had been called to be a channel for His love, and grateful that I had learned to listen and follow directions, even when I did not know why. I was grateful that my husband had become accustomed to inspired thoughts and avenues of service and that he supports my efforts. I was allowed the privilege of serving my grieving aunt and uncle, and assisting in the preparation of a memorial service for my cousin, utilizing years of experience in supporting the grieving, to now give to my family.

God guides me toward acts of love, consideration and kindness to those around me, with an attitude of care and respect. God’s creation benefits from inspired thoughts that I recognize and act upon and through service I have discovered joy to be the source of my happiness.

May you be blessed with inspired guidance and experience the joy of serving with love,
Carol Ann Preston

www.roomforhealing.com
www.take12radio.com
Remembering Who We Are: a workbook by Carol Ann Preston